A Parent’s Job
“Never delegate to someone else the job that belongs to you.”
I once heard these wise words at a conference, and they have impacted me ever since. Initially, this applied to my teaching career. But it has also impacted my work as a parent.
During my years as a teacher, I learned there were many ways to raise children. I knew parents who were on every detail. They checked backpacks, made nutritious lunches, sent frequent notes and questions and studied with their child before every single test.
I also knew parents who were stressed and busy. They worked long hours, adored their children, wished for more time and supported the work we were doing with late night reviews and conversations in the car.
And, sadly, I knew parents who believed that every part of schooling, every bit of extra studying, every single thing that had anything to do with their child academically, was wholly and entirely my job as their child’s teacher.
As a momma, I am reminded nearly every day that children need parents who will support their academic lives by working alongside the teachers, the schools, on a daily basis. The job of raising our children is not to be delegated to anyone else. Not to school. Not to church. Not to any organization or individual. You are the expert on your children. They need you today and tomorrow, on hard days and on great days, in struggle and in success.
And sometimes, this can be overwhelming. Sometimes, we do not know the way. So, we build a team of people who can come alongside and speak life and truth into the lives of our kids.
We connect to teachers in a positive way, trusting them to do good work and supporting the lessons they teach. We get to know youth workers and Sunday School teachers, and make ourselves aware of the content they are covering so we can talk about it at home. And when times are tough and we need more help, we do the same with doctors, therapists and educational experts.
We build a beautiful team. And we help them while they help us, all the while understanding that the job of raising these children is not to be given away. It is not the teacher’s job alone to teach your child to read or to add or to interact with other children. Yes, it happens at school, but it also happens at home.
Tonight, I will tuck four children into bed and pray over them as they fall asleep. Tonight, I will think about their needs and I will remind myself again that this job, however hard it may be, belongs to my husband and to me. And we will take that seriously as we study for tests, talk about sermons, and storm the gates of Heaven for them every day. We will continue to build our team and we will appreciate and honor their contribution toward the growth of our sweet kids. We will thank them often and stay in contact and communicate clearly.
Because that is what it takes to do the job we love.
Step families come with a variety of challenges to weather from the moment they say “I do.” Ron Deal addresses specific challenges and offers biblical insight as well as clinical experience as a marriage and family therapist to help equip couples for the journey ahead. He offers hope and encouragement for helping families navigate establishing working relationships within the new family as well as with the extended family.
http://glendora.patch.com/articles/your-marriage-is-a-gift Advice for weathering the storms of marriage from the Glendora Patch
"More importantly, if it is so difficult, why bother trying to make marriage work? For starters, it is one of the greatest gifts you can give your children. Research consistently shows that children tend to fare better in married, two-parent households. The investment you make in your marriage not only rewards you and your spouse, the dividends spill over to your children as well"