Sooner or later, your kids will ask about the birds and the bees. Conversations with children about sex can be uncomfortable, but we can’t leave this job to the school or the church. Our kids are looking for answers and we parents need to be the first, best place they go for answers. We step up and have these conversations, even if they are difficult and can make us really uneasy.
Deuteronomy 6:7 talks about speaking with your kids about God's truths through all the aspects of your day. It says, “Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” This should include God's truth about sex. Are you comfortable talking about sex in your home? In our family, we’ve always tried to have these conversations with our kids in simple and relaxed ways at young ages so the pressure for the "BIG TALK" never has a chance to build up. That way we create an environment where they feel comfortable coming to us with questions and we can be their source of information.
I’m reminded of a postcard we received from camp one summer. Our daughter was once at camp and sent us a postcard in the middle of the week. She told us how she got to hold snakes and rabbits in the nature shack, how they swam in the lake and played capture the flag. She said her bunkmates were nice and her counselor was great. Then the surprise was in the middle of all these normal things, when she wrote, “Please write me right away and tell me what 'getting raped' means.” We read this postcard through several times asking ourselves, “Did she really ask that?” We were just grateful that when the topic came up, she felt comfortable to come to us first with this question.
Talk honestly to your kids when they are asking questions, and seize these teachable moments without shying away from the issue. Answer questions about sex in a relaxed way, without translating our anxiety onto our kids. God created sex as a good thing--don't let the culture make it anything less than God's gift for married couples! Answer them honestly but simply. You don’t have to talk about being found under a cabbage leaf or dropped off by the stork. We can give them straight answers. But neither do you need to explain in excessive detail. Just answer appropriately for the age of your child. But do answer them! Be the source of answers for your kids, or they will seek answers elsewhere!
